I went out for ministry time, convince myself that i will not cry, not pray and not expect all the emotional roller coaster. I just want Jesus to heal me of my thought life and i really wanted the Holy spirit to live out from inside of me to over take my whole being. I stood there not thinking not praying. For a long time i waited, everyone ard me was prayed for but me.
Ps Dan came and lay his hands and prayed, he told me that my past experience with churches and leadership are weighing me down etc etc... He continue to tell me that he saw a vision and he will speak from my destiny. He saw me holding my bible and sharing teaching the word of God. Though all these are somewhat my dreams but is long suppress.
I did not cry much as i told myself not to be emotional,i often think too much at ministry time that i miss God. so i will just wait upon the lord. Anyway, Ps Dan know my past so for him to said those are not suprising to me.
Shortly, Lilian came and prayed for me. Neither did she ask what i prayer did i came up for, she just pray...Finally she stop and ask me what are the desire i ask the LOrd? All of the sudden my tears duct burst, i recalled many many many many many things i want from the lord, to share the gospel to many, if Christ die for all, all men have the rights to hear the gospel so his blood will not shed in vain. I want to live intimately with God, knowing his heart beat, living the glorious life, etc etc.....
I forgotten all abt them. She continue to comfirm with me what she felt, she saw a stopper being unplug by God and all the disappointment and sense of lost Hope are being drained away from me...after she walked away, i stood there and listen to God speak to me,
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